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  • Emma Nuttall

The healing power of friendship

Find your tribe and love them hard!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we never had to suffer from heartache, loss or failure. Or if there was a magic solution that could make everything better.

Unfortunately, suffering is simply a part of life.

However, there is something that can make managing and recovering from the difficult times in your life a whole lot easier.

A group of people who rally around and support you through difficult times in your life, provide you with a sense of community and encourage you to pursue your dreams.

It’s time to build your tribe!

Your tribe members are people who accept you just as you are. It may be time to ask yourself if the people in your current support network truly have your back? Do they show you genuine care and understanding and encourage you to live your best life?

Understand that the role of your support network isn’t to shower you with compliments or turn a blind eye when you behave badly. Your tribe are there to have the hard conversations and tell you what you need to hear as opposed to what you want to hear, but to do it constructively and without judgement.

Being part of a tribe also involves giving back. It requires active listening, selfless acts and sharing in pain while also celebrating the good times. According to author and research professor Brené Brown,

“True belonging is not passive. It’s not fitting in or pretending or selling out because it’s safer. It’s a practice that requires us to be vulnerable, get uncomfortable and learn how to be present with people without sacrificing who we are”.

Are you ready? Then you will need my top tips for building your tribe:

  • Truly know yourself first by reflecting on your core values and accepting all facets of your personality.

  • Know what qualities you seek in others.

  • Identify your passions and the activities you derive the greatest enjoyment from then explore related classes and clubs in your area where you can connect with like-minded people.

  • Be open to new experiences and show up as your authentic self.

  • Seek to establish genuine connections based on mutual respect.

Surrounding yourself with the right people can take time and will require you to be vulnerable and at times uncomfortable however it will set you up for a lifetime of love, support and happiness!.

For more info and tips, read my ‘Finding Your Tribe’ article in Wellbeing magazine, edition 177.

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